What kind of shorts do clouds wear?
Thunderpants
What did the horse say after it tripped?
Help! I’ve fallen and I can’t giddyup!
Did you hear about the fire at the circus?
It was in tents!
I told my boss three companies were after me and I needed a raise to stay at my job. We haggled for a few minutes, and he gave me a 5% raise.
Leaving his office, he stopped and asked me, "By the way, which companies are after you?" I responded, "The gas, electric, and cable company."
What do you call Batman when he skips church? Christian Bale.